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Post by IGNATIA TRIMMING on Feb 27, 2013 18:42:53 GMT -5
How could he just leave her like that? Without a single word! Not even one little inkling of warning! Ignatia was fuming! Pissed beyond all belief! Her feet slapped the ground as she approached the address she'd managed to find after days of searching. Which she only started after a good few months of not seeing. She'd given him the benefit of the doubt, maybe he was just on a small trip, but no. He had up and left for New York!
"You're going to regret that move druggie." She growled as she looked at the door to a building. Decently sized, definitely not a poor example of a house. Definitely better than that place she had called home in DC. In fact, her mind went through the idea of ordering to stay at his home after she got done beating him within an inch of his life. Heck, if he wasn't sorry enough maybe she'd just kill him and take the house. Agreeing with the plan she found a second to grin between her angry scowls.
All of those thoughts would have to wait for a second. She had to get up the set of stairs that led to the door of her Erik's home, and then make sure he was actually there. With narrow eyes she climbed the stairs, suddenly confronted with that thought. If he wasn't there she didn't know what she'd do. Wait at his stairs like some kind of lonely puppy? Whatever! That wasn't a thought for the now. It was a thought for when the door opened. Or, rather, didn't open depending.
Her small body finished climbing the stairs, each stepping being an almost completely silent hope, in a manner of seconds. She'd skipped steps with her skipping strides (a motion that gave the idea of innocence despite the absence of it in her intent), and when she reached the door she made sure to be silent until she reached the door. Small knuckles rapped against the door for a few seconds before she saw a doorbell, something her home had lacked. With a sigh of irritation she took up holding down its button instead. She could hear the ringing of it within the house, its sound being slightly distorted as the song it was meant to play simply looped its first few seconds of notes.
"COME ON DAMMIT! ANSWER THE FUCKING DOOR ERIK!" It only took a second for Ignatia to lose her patience. Her face, which had previously just held a scowl, twisted up into a rage filled expression. How dare he make her wait for even a second after leaving like that! How dare he come to her house, spend time with her, try and help her, and then fucking leave without a word! And then to let her sit with no response! What detestable behavior!
By the time he would, or wouldn't, reach the door Ignatia would be far beyond logical levels of anger. Her fists clenched tightly at her sides, so tightly that the knuckles turned paper white, while her eyes wished to burn holes in the door.
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Post by ERIK ALEJANDRO on Feb 28, 2013 8:03:02 GMT -5
[style=float: left; margin-right: 10px; border: 7px E81051 solid;]  it wasn't like erik meant to up and leave with no warning, but he was told to notify no one about his little inconvenience. he didn't want to leave everyone behind - alex, daki, iggy - but they told him that if he didn't disappear without a sound, they'd find a way to make him pay. so he had no choice but to pack up and leave, leaving money behind to let one of the bozos that he lived with to pay the rent. he made sure his friends were set up, and then he left - no note, no sign except for the recently cleaned room he left behind.
it was safe to assume that erik missed the people he left behind, being without the company he used to seek. the worst part about it was that the government had found out what took him twenty-two years to hide. he was a morph, created in the government facilities, except for the fact that he was taken out of the environment and managed to be disguised as a human for the bulk of his life. now, however, he also happened to be a government dog, getting close to the free morphs that he happened to look to as friends, eventually being told to turn on them and give them back to whence they came.
yeah, fuck that.
he was in bed when the doorbell went off - not asleep, but it wasn't much of a change since the government moved to new york. he figured that ignoring the doorbell would tell whoever it was that he wasn't in, and hopefully they'd leave. the only issue was that the bell continued to ring even after he rolled over, throwing a pillow over his head. someone seemed to be yelling, a voice that he recognized immediately. it was iggy - but what was she doing out of DC?
then it hit him like a sack of bricks.
shit.
" hold your horses! i'm coming. "
ignoring the headache that throbbed in the back of his skull, ignoring the fact that he knew there was going to be some sort price to pay for the fact that he up and left her too. pajama pants on, erik almost hesitated when opening the door, suddenly remembering the scar that adorned his chest purely because of this unstable woman, and how she tried to give him surgery in an alleyway because he just so happened to be waiting for someone who'd take his - ah - merchandise.
without a moments hesitation, erik unlocked the door. though, he did hesitate when he opened it, immediately taking a few steps back. " am i going to be able to explain or are you going to pull my heart out here and now? "
he hoped it was the former.
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Post by IGNATIA TRIMMING on Mar 1, 2013 23:00:51 GMT -5
The call of 'hold your horses' did nothing to calm Ignatia down whatsoever. In fact, the request did very little aside from dig Erik's hole deeper. Why should she have to calm down? If anything she felt she could be more mad! After all, now not only was he making her wait like some kind of ungentlemanly jerk (something he had never been before he left her), he was also now trying to make her feel like she couldn't be upset!
"I'll be holding your spleen in a second if you don't answer this damn door Erik!" She called in reply, her fists clenching tighter and dark thoughts of vengeance fueled dissection populating her thoughts. However, when he reached the door and began to open it she couldn't help but feel her hands loosen slightly, and feel her grimace of rage reduced to nothing more than an angry scowl. Understand, she was still upset, but he always seemed to have this calming quality to him. This opposite that could almost, but not quite, keep her in check.
"Fucking open the door so I can talk to you if you don't want to lose your heart today. And believe me, if you don't listen to me I'll take it. I need a new one anyway, the one I had recently withered up and died. Not sure why." Iggy almost began to ramble, though she pulled herself back so she could continue to glare at Erik and get her thoughts across without the need of violence, "You have no idea how much glee it would bring me to lay you out and slowly harvest all your organs, but right now I won't do it. But first you've gotta let me inside and try and vent all of this," and at this she gestured to herself, her rigid posture, her tight neck, the way her voice nearly shook. "without making you scream, and not in a good way either."
By the end of her little exposition, a mix of insanity and heartfelt sadness, she almost looked a little bit pleading. Her wrathful scowl seemed to hold a bit of hurt. Around the eyes one who was attentive could see the way her focus shifted from feet to Erik to feet, and her eyebrows held the faintest hint of a curve. Though she would never admit it, Erik leaving her did more than make her angry. It made her feel sad, betrayed. How could he just leave without telling her? How dare he make her feel like this.
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Post by ERIK ALEJANDRO on Mar 2, 2013 21:41:49 GMT -5
[style=float: left; margin-right: 10px; border: 7px E81051 solid;] inwardly, erik was beating himself to a pulp. he knew damn well before he left exactly what he thought about iggy - after all, it wasn't the first time he was pretty sure he liked someone. naturally, he let his old habits get in the way and just when he was certain that the two of them were going to go places together and, hell, maybe even have her warm up to him to the point of building an actual relationship, he left without a word. he knew it was his fault, he knew that whatever punishment the sadistic doctor was to come up with, he'd end up taking it without much of a complaint. he knew that the moment he'd end up looking into her eyes that he'd turn into putty in her hands and practically be begging for forgiveness. deep down, erik knew full well that it was all his fault - him and his damned habit of pushing people away the moment he thought of them as being actually close to him - and he was beating himself up since he left because of it.
he should never have left her.
he was sorry.
no answer was given to her yelled response, because he didn't have anything to say in return. instead, the door swung open and he took a few precautionary steps back. while she sounded absolutely furious with him, erik couldn't help but feel a frown slip in place where his trademark smile would stand, his eyebrows drawing up in a sign of genuine guilt. she ranted - one thing he could honestly say that he particularly liked about her, iggy always was one of the ones he fell rather hard for - and he felt his lips twinge ever so slightly in hopes of being drawn into a full smile. they didn't, he continued frowning, holding up a hand and drawing it back in that way that said "come on in".
he wasn't entirely sure his voice would have worked anyway.
erik would have been lying if he said that he felt guilty. he felt something that went beyond guilt, because he caused the pained look in her eyes - he caused the obvious anger and hurt that was obviously bubbling there for some time - he caused the insomnia that just so happened to plague him since his move. almost as a nervous habit, erik bit down on his lower lip. he didn't know what to say - what was there to say?
deep breaths. he wasn't going to let this effect him in the way he was certain it should have. he cleared his throat, pushing down the lump that had risen in it, as erik averted his gaze completely. " i'm sorry, iggy. i didn't have any other choice. "
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Post by IGNATIA TRIMMING on Mar 10, 2013 13:46:55 GMT -5
silence
As it dragged on Iggy's nerves became more and more frantic. Her vulnerable expression and posture, the subtle bits that strayed away from anger began to be clouded over with rage again. Fists tightened again, eyes narrowed, teeth began to grind once more. She glared up at him with renewed irritation as he said nothing in response. Unlike Erik, the guilt she saw in the man did nothing but heat her up more. Now it was his turn to feel bad?
When he gestured for her to come in she stormed in. Feet stomped, one of her arms casually pushed Erik to the side as she entered. Her breath was heavy when she took a seat in his main room. She waited for him in a hunched posture, fingers attempting to strange the fabric of her shirt. She said she wouldn't resort to violence. No hitting, no cutting, no anything. Just words. In fact, she mumbled it to herself like a chant.
"Just speech, just speech, just speech." An unstable whisper as her fists began to tremble more, as she struggled more and more against the silence that was still filling that damn room. Then he spoke. And when he spoke it answered nothing. Did nothing. She'd expected explanations. Even though the apology did a little to soften her it was like throwing pebbles at a rampaging beast. It only affected her for a second before she blew up, angrier than before. Despite her height she jumped up, walked over to Erik, and pulled him down to her level. Her fists leaving the fabric of her shirt to take his in a death grip that with anyone else would have been meant for his neck.
"That's all you've got for me! 'I had no choice'. You better have more for me than that! I swear, if you don't have more for me than that!" Ignatia's hands trembled in their hold on Erik's shirt. Her eyes, dark with lack of sleep, worn from the shifts of emotions, burned holes into Erik's with their gaze. At least, that was the intention of the harsh look she shot at him.
"I swear! If this 'no choice' was anything but lethal danger to you I won't forgive you! I'll, I'll, I'll..." Her voice trailed off as it tried to break on her, "Just speech, just speech, just speech." The chant was whispered again as she released him and made her way to her seat again. She collapsed into it, placing her face in her hands.
"Just fucking talk." As she gave the choked order her hands found her shirt again.
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Post by ERIK ALEJANDRO on Mar 10, 2013 14:43:25 GMT -5
[style=float: left; margin-right: 10px; border: 7px E81051 solid;] she stomped in, pushing him to the side - causing erik to stumble as he tried to regain the balance that she knocked off. then, he followed her into the living room, taking a seat on the chair opposite of her. though, after a few minutes, he couldn't keep himself still and decided to go with standing, pacing around in front of her. she jumped up, catching him completely off guard, as he was pulled down to her. the frown creasing his face deepened, and he averted his gaze to the side.
she deserved an explanation - but he wasn't sure on where to start. he could have started with the beginning, but where would that have been in the first place? he felt her hands tremble, erik taking a deep breath. " there is a lot more than that. it's just- i don't know where to start, honestly. " he turned his gaze back to her, fully taking in what the wear and tear of him leaving for the first time. whether he deserved it or not, the guilt continued to settle in the pit of his stomach like a stone, weighing him down. he forced himself to stay focused on her, though, running through all the places on where he deserved to begin telling her.
" not just me, but to you as well. and dana, and everyone else i'd ever so much as come into contact with in dc. if i hadn't disappeared without a word - if i had even just said goodbye - they would have killed you. " he paused, going to take a seat in the chair across from her again. " i don't remember telling you that i'm a morph, or that i hid it from the government while i sat in an office, working for them, absorbing information as i fed it right back to the rebels. how for a short period of time, i was working for them as well as leading the rebels - or how that bomb that blew up a few higher-up positioned people was my idea. "
he wanted to curl up and sleep it away, to push all of the bad things that were resurfacing back down, if only for a little while. he didn't want to feel all guilt that was rising, or the swelling feeling in his heart that he got whenever iggy was around. to be fair, erik didn't want to feel at all. " so they told me to move to new york without so much as a peep of where i was going, to work under them until i was deemed dealt with. now i'm the government's bitch with a renewed tattoo on my wrist. "
" i did it to protect you, ignatia. "
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Post by IGNATIA TRIMMING on Mar 10, 2013 14:58:41 GMT -5
Ignatia did her best to listen through the rushing in her ears. She listened to every bit of his story, though not all of it registered perfectly. The bit on him being a morph caught her a bit off guard, but she'd heard of stranger, and the secret was nothing life changing. To her surprise, she felt her anger penetrated by a bit of pride when he explained his actions against the government. Pretty clever for a pothead. But then things went downhill.
Hearing about his relocation cleared up some things. That's why he had to disappear, and fast. She followed along for awhile. They'd hurt him otherwise wouldn't they? Her mind went straight to him and his well being. She could almost forgive him if he really was in such danger. Then one sentence through everything on its head.
'I did it to protect you Ignatia'
She didn't stand up this time but Ignatia did go rigid, and again her breathing picked up. Her eyes wide and her face contorted with rage she looked at him from her seat, hands aching to rip apart the fabric they kept balling into a tighter and tighter knot. Her voice when it escaped her held such roughness it seemed to scrape at her throat as it left her.
"I didn't need your damn protection from the government!" As she screamed her hands released her shirt to slam on the arm rest of the seat, "How fucking thrashed do you have to be to think I would ever need your help to deal with them! Did you really think I'd be in any kind of danger? I've fled from them so many times, fought with them a good handful of times! I have never needed anyone's protection from them! Against her will, the will that had held strong for so many years through so many things, her eyes began to fill with tears, a few escaping her. Angry tears for the most part.
"I needed you to save me from this!" On this she placed both hands firmly on her head, "I, I needed you to help with this danger! I fucking relied on you to keep this from finishing what it started! To stop him from finishing what he started! I was getting better, I could sleep sometimes! Then you left without telling me! The nightmares, the insomnia, the darkness, the memories, all of them came back!"
Though she had planned to stay seated she found her way to her feet, again walked over to Erik. But this time she could do little but fall against him, pounding fists childishly against his chest. Her tears picked up pace, hiccups began to break apart her speech as she tried desperately to speak around the lump in her throat.
"I n-needed y-you so much!" Her fists stopped pounding and just gripped to his shirt, needing some kind of comfort, "I could have t-taken any t-torture or pain from them. B-but I c-couldn't e-escape myself Erik. I'd n-never been able t-to escape myself b-before you. And I c-couldn't after you e-either."
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Post by ERIK ALEJANDRO on Mar 10, 2013 17:33:24 GMT -5
[style=float: left; margin-right: 10px; border: 7px E81051 solid;] thankfully, she listened to him. he wasn't interrupted when he started going on through his explanation, instead he was able to finish it without so much has a peep from her - except he did notice the sudden rigidity that seemed to overcome her at the mentioning of protecting her. erik watched as her breathing picked up, and when she looked at him he winced a little, seeing the absolute rage in her face. but no, he wasn't going to let her tell him that what he did was wrong - seeing as how it was the last thing he had to hold on to as the events continued to unfold in front of him. the only that left him any sort of comfort while he was stuck in new york was the reassuring thought of keeping iggy safe. so long as she was safe, nothing else seemed to matter.
" except, iggy, you kind of do. " he forced his voice to stay level, forced the sudden rising negativity down. if he couldn't keep the memories from resurfacing, then he was going to make damn sure that he was going to keep the emotions from breaching the surface. " if the government got their hands on you of all people, i don't know what i'd do. i don't think they'd even hesitate in killing you had i not cooperated, because if anything it would be them getting back at me for the twenty years i've spent running from them. if they really wanted you, they'd probably find a way to get you. " he bit his lip as he watched her tear up, her next comment silencing him for a little while, at least.
out of all of the things he continues to tell himself, that was one of the things that brought the guilt pummeling back. the fact that he was saving her from herself - from whatever the person before him put on her. " i know. i thought that you'd be able to forget me and find someone who'd probably be better for you. " he didn't know how else to phrase it - that iggy could do a lot better than him. but if she were willing to forgive him at any time, he'd be more than willing to drop everything and tend to her - because that was the one thing in the world that he could honestly say he cared for anymore.
what he didn't expect was for her to get up and start pounding against his chest, as he went to carefully put his arms around her. he hoped that she wouldn't freak out like she tended to, but if she did he'd end up letting go. " i know, and i'm sorry. i wouldn't be able to sit still knowing you were going to be tortured or killed, though. i'm here now, though, and i'm not going anywhere any time soon. "
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Post by IGNATIA TRIMMING on Mar 12, 2013 17:52:19 GMT -5
Ignatia just shuddered against Erik as she listened to him. She fought to reign herself in, an effort that was hard to balance with her previous task. Nonetheless, she managed to quiet herself as he spoke and wrapped his arms around her. Another shudder went from her head to her toes, one of a different origin, but she didn't panic. In fact, she found herself curling into him, pulling her legs to her chest and keeping her face in his chest.
With her tears had gone her rage. Not because she was no longer angry. No, she was still furious, but because the feelings took so much out of her. Especially since telling him about her problems since he'd left had brought them fresh to her memories again. For the next few minutes she did little but lie against him and shudder. Her energy was lacking when she managed to sit up and look at Erik. She would have scowled but she was too busy getting in a sniffle, and she figured her tear-stained eyes would ruin the effect either way.
"It seems you missed on the torture bit. Though me still being alive is a plus. I guess." She sighed, leaning against him, this time with her head tilted up towards him. It was moments like this that made Ignatia happy he was such a tall guy. She fit so nicely in his arms. Even when she knew that it would be more productive towards her cause to be sitting on the other side of the room.
"I'm going to hold you to that," Ignatia spoke again after a bit of time, "the not leaving again part that is." She continued in an attempt to clarify. For now she figured she'd let the argument go. If for no other reason than the fact that being so near him was bringing her closer and closer to sleep that had alluded her for the last few months. A yawn escaped her as she found herself leaning more heavily against him.
"When I wake up-" Her sentence was cut short by a yawn, "You owe me tea, and a lot of attention. You got me?" As she spoke her demands her sentence was scattered randomly by her attempts to stifle yawns that were trying to knock her out before she was ready. However, once those demands were stated she couldn't help but go limp with sleep. It only took a few seconds for soft breathing (and a few ungraceful snores) to begin their trips through the air of the room.
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Post by ERIK ALEJANDRO on Mar 18, 2013 21:20:06 GMT -5
[style=float: left; margin-right: 10px; border: 7px E81051 solid;] a lump had formed in his throat as he resisted the urge to pull iggy even closer to him, resisting the urge to place his chin on top of her head, to surround himself with the comforting thoughts of being with her and not leaving her for the animals who resided in dc. she continued to shudder, erik being unable to pinpoint it as whether she was scared, uncomfortable, or just drained ( he figured if it was the first two that she'd at least alert him ), but he did release his grip when she sat up. saying that his chest clenched when he saw her tear stained face, her sniffles, and erik's face turned into a frown. he could keep showering her in apologies, or he could take actions to ensure that this would never happen again - he vowed never to leave her behind again, even if he knew that she would have had his head either way. erik's frown deepened, deciding to add on that if he ever had to move suddenly again, he'd bring her along.
he hoped that wouldn't be the case, though.
a deep sigh, releasing his own shudder at her words. " i'd prefer you not getting too involved with the government anyway. they'd use you as leverage to get me to do things. " she leaned back against him, erik's arms falling back around her protectively. " you fall asleep, and i'll be here to keep the nightmares away. " a mumbled comment as he felt her lean back more against him, erik doing the same so that he could - hopefully - nod off as well. " i got you. " he managed to squeeze in when she passed out, waiting for the first snore before placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.
after a few hours of - presumably - peaceful sleep, erik felt consciousness nagging at him to get up. while he didn't exactly feel that much rested, cracking open an eye to look down at the sleeping form sprawled on his chest. he wondered if she'd wake up eventually on her own or if he'd have to sneak out from under her to go make tea. it didn't take much thought to decide that he was staying right where he was.
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Post by IGNATIA TRIMMING on Mar 24, 2013 21:10:05 GMT -5
Ignatia slept deeply and peacefully. Just as she had expected and hoped it was the most fulfilling sleep she'd had in months. Erik just had that effect on her. Maybe it was just the subconscious knowledge that she had someone willing to help and protect her, but every time she had him nearby while she slept her nightmares didn't bother her. Memories didn't take their chance, away from the dulling effects of her medicine. to penetrate her mind.
Still, when she woke she found herself vulnerable for a second. She was in someone's arms and it didn't instantly register who. A deep breath, a sharp whistling intake, and then a heavy sigh and a quaking shudder as she recognized Erik and her adrenaline fell off. Ignatia's eyes shot a silent accusation, though it held no water. Scaring her like that after such a peaceful sleep, how rude. As she rubbed her eyes she scolded.
"I thought I said I expected tea when I woke up, Erik." She stated, voice tough against the image of her removing the sleep from her eyes, "Keeping me waiting, you're losing points." As she half-yawned the phrase Ignatia rolled out of his lap, escaping his arm with a graceful duck and throwing herself back into the other seat in the room. Ignatia's feet kicked over one of its arms as she stared at him.
"Well, as long as it's good I suppose I'll be fine." She continued with a theatrical sigh before making a shooing motion, as if to say 'but it still needs to be here soon'. Expecting him to just get up and move she went back to sitting idly back in her seat, feet resuming their kicking pattern and fingers finding their ways into her hair.
No matter what she was going to be rough with Erik for at least the next few days, but if he messed up the apology she'd designed it'd be worse. Not in a physical way, as she'd made an inner pledge not to communicate like that. At least not with him. But it would be much more of a chore to gain her favor again.
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